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NOTE:
This
answer was given on June, 27, 2008, during the Shangra-la conference
in Hawaii.
Answer from Mother Mary:
Again, my beloved,
this is a very broad and extensive topic, and we will gradually bring
forth more teachings specifically on relationships. But what can be
said at this point is that the failure of all human relationships is
due to an imbalance between the masculine and feminine elements of each
of the people involved in those relationships.
And thus, you often see people – in their blindness – going
into an ego reaction, where they start blaming other people. And this,
my beloved, again ties into your earlier discussion about the shoulds
and the should-nots. Because when you have an imbalance between masculine
and feminine in your own being, then you also have a false image of
what should or should not happen in your relationship and in your own
life.
For as I stated earlier, you create a mental box, and the first person
that you put into that mental box is yourself. So now, my beloved, because
of that imbalance, you have a sense of being incomplete, somehow inadequate.
And thus, when you engage in relationships, you enter those relationships
with the consciousness of being in a deficit, of missing something,
of having to get something from your relationships. You are looking
for other people to complete you and to compensate for what you perceive
as a lack, an insufficiency in yourself. And thus, you build this sense
of what other people should or should not do in order for your ego to
feel complete and thus feel secure.
Yet, when you study the teachings
on the ego, you see clearly that this is an impossible quest. For
your ego will never feel complete and secure—only your Conscious
Self can feel complete and secure. For you can only feel complete
and secure when you stop looking for anything in the material world,
including other people, to complete you. Because instead, you redirect
your attention to see that your completeness comes from your own Higher
Being, which is already complete the way God created it, as an extension
of itself, my beloved.
And so, can you see that when you allow yourself to step into the reality
distortion field of the ego, you think you are incomplete, you think
other people should complete you, and therefore should do this or shouldn’t
do that, so that you can feel complete and in control. Yet, what you
cannot see in your blindness is that the people you attract to you are
also trapped in the ego. For if you are completely centered in your
Higher Being, then you would not attract to you those kind of relationships.
So actually, when you are blinded by the ego, you attract people to
you who are also blinded by the ego, and thus will either magnify the
imbalance in yourself – so that it becomes more visible –
or they will have the opposite extreme of the extreme in which you have
entered. Thus again, making your own imbalance more visible.
And thus, you see, my beloved, that a relationship that is based on
a deficit is doomed from the very beginning to be a rocky road. And
indeed, what you will see is that many relationships end after a very
short time by both sides blaming the other and feeling that the other
did not live up to what they should have done. And therefore, it is
justified to break off the relationship and blame it on the mote in
the other person’s eye, instead of looking for the beam in your
own.
And thus, you also see that some relationships find a certain balance,
where the people actually learn not to push the ego buttons, and therefore
enter into what we might call a ceasefire agreement, where there is
what seems to be – and what is in a sense – a relative peace
that allows the people to maintain a relationship. Yet it is a relationship
that does not give spiritual growth, or at least gives it very slowly.
So that people after an entire lifetime in such a relationship might
only have grown a small portion of the potential for growth that they
had in that lifetime—if they had been more willing to look at
the beam in their own eye.
And thus, you as the spiritual people should realize that when you have
conflict in your relationships, you need to look for the beam in your
own eye. You need to look for the state of imbalance between masculine
and feminine in yourself.
You need to use the teachings we have given, the tools we have given
in these last several
rosaries, and other rosaries that will be forthcoming, on balancing
the masculine and feminine aspect of your own being, my beloved. So
that you can find a balanced relationship with your partner, whether
it is a regular relationship between man and woman, or even the relationship
with parents, siblings, co-workers or other people that you enter into
relationships with in a broad sense.
NOTE: You can also use the
Rosary for Loving
Yourself to heal your sense of incompleteness.
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Copyright
© 2008 by Kim Michaels |
